As part of its cunning plan to wean Melburnians off their unhealthy obsession with attending football matches in winter, the AFL has skilfully ensured that no games will be played in Melbourne on Saturday or Sunday over the split round.Wearing a natty “Foxtel Rule$” tie, AFL Chief Executive Officer Andrew Demetriou said that the idea that attending football matches was a popular winter pastime for Melburnians was an outdated concept.
“These days, people in Melbourne have every expectation that they should fill their weekends with shopping and getting stuck in traffic jams before settling down in the evening with their Foxtel remote in hand and watching games being televised from football’s new frontier,” he said.
“The midseason break isn’t just for weary players, you know,” Demetriou insisted. “It’s also for our spectators who have overdosed on football during the first 11 weeks and need a serious breather from their weekend routine of watching their club in person.”
“Sure there were big crowds at VFL matches over the weekend and we’re disappointed with that return to grass roots footy, but with the help of Channel 7 we think that the public is getting the picture that AFL isn’t a right, it’s a very expensive and poorly managed privilege.”
