The annual snooze-fest known to tennis tragics as the French Open commenced today with the amusing sight of players who aren’t Spanish, South American or Roger Federer, stepping tentatively out onto the surface of red clay like soldiers onto a field of land mines. The American men, like the proverbial ‘lapins’ in the headlights, were all eliminated in the first round, thereby allowing themselves extra sight-seeing time in Paris.
Lleyton ‘Chuckles’ Hewitt performed his traditional escape act coming from two sets down against former winner Gaston Gaudio to win in five but failed to complete the job in the press conference, graciously praising Gaudio as “an outstanding shotmaker” to the astonishment of the assembled media.
The usual roll call of Robredos, Ferrers, Ferreros, Chelas, Almagros and Monacos have begun their steady, unspectacular and serve/volley-free march through the tournament, though requests from spectators and sponsors to simply play 14 consecutive Federer v Nadal matches over the two weeks were refused by organisers.
In the women’s draw … Henin, Sharapova … a Williams or two, Russians, blah, blah, blah …. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Wimbledon starts on June 25.
